Proud to move them and get dismissed

All will be quick. It will surely take more to read it, than the 5 minutes that it really lasted.

Josette comes. Put your micro on and when you hear your number, go to the room. Open the door, step in the middle of the circle. Sing your songs and when you’re done, turn around and go to the exit on the right. Don’t come back to the entrance as the previous girl has just done. Don’t be impressed, the set is impressive and the jury also is. Don’t worry, all will be the best that can be ok ?

Of course it will.

Number 0323. Come in.

I walk the 5 meters to the door, with the camera following me.

Hello guys ! I say.

I am the one who says hi, André M. says. This guys is like the toughest of the jury. A jazz pianist and author-compositor. So far I have never heard any of his works but I think he is the only guy I will care about. But man he is so proud … anyway I step in the middle of the circle. Full smile. Seeing the 4 guys there, already bored at the beginning of the day.

Philippe M., a journalist of another time, specialized in rock and oldies. He can say where wherever a any rock star had a line of coke and never takes his sunglasses off.

André M. Already described. Skilled and proud. The alpha wolf.

L., a sexy girl from the 80’s; THE illustration of confusion between music and business.

Marco P., a funk famous singer, new in the jury. Dreadlocks and deep voice.

What’s your name?

Julien.

Where from … what are you going to sing ?

Lyon. La Vie en Rose. Don't worry be happy.

And after the basic info here I go …

"Des yeux qui font baisser les miens; un rire qui se perd sur sa bouche …."

Smiles. Emotion. I think I’m doing well. My goal is : move them. Love them. Make them feel something. You may not fit in the hole but make them feel. They felt. André stops me and asks me for the second song.

"Here is a little song I wrote, you might want to sing it note for note, don’t worry, be happy ….".

And they seemed to follow the indications ; they seemed not to worry and they seemed happy. Here they are, smiling, laughing, moved again.

Alpha wolf stops me again. He got it.

Then I think “I made it, my songs are oldies so Philippe will like it. I sang gospel blues style so Marco may have liked it. And André and L. smiled so much that obvious I made it with both of them. More that L. always love when a guy can sing a little bit.”

Ok, well not :)

Marco : "You are not supposed to change the lyrics, even when you want to sing La Vie en Rose for a woman. And I don’t think you are the Nouvelle Star. But thank you, you made me feel happy. No." Ok well to be true I say this guy is famous but … I never heard his music and I asked to all my friends and neither did they. So well maybe his style is different from mine so ok.

L. : “Your songs are oldies, your style is old, I felt like in a cabaret in the 20’s. And neither do I think that you are the Nouvelle Star. No.” Surprise. The few times I watched the show, L. would say yes to every guy. Anyway.

Philippe : “I agree with the other guys, you know we embody the future in this show. You sing songs from the past. And you always smile, we don’t know if it is fake or not. So sorry but as we want to be the future, for me it is … No.” Very surprising for a guy who has built his fame on the Rolling Stones, Aerosmith, Queen and Gainsbourg. He may not like when music is too vintage. So now what will the proudest guy say ….

André M. :"It’s a pity. For me of course it is a yes. You moved us, you have a great vocal technique. You arrive here as a prince, you seem so secure and proud. Even when you stand in front of us and speak, I wish I could be like this. But if the other guys are not ok, so sorry but we have to say goodbye.” Wow. Only surprises. I am glad. Very glad THE proud guy told me things like that. More that he is the jazz musician. Am so proud.

Now time to turn around and take the exit on the right side. Ok, let’s go.

So once again cameras, interview. Honesty, mission accomplished (I moved them !) and expectations met (I don’t meet the requirements). Now I ‘m happy, I have all the afternoon free and I can go to party for my nephew’s 15^th birthday. And tomorrow I will go to work and play in the metro.

Awesome experience guys; thanks for the emotions and for the interesting points of view. “Good luck for next year”, a guy’s mum tells me. “There will not be next year. I learnt what I had to learn.” And am happy very happy. And I don' t worry. And I see la vie en rose.

Was not a piece of cake ; but now let's have one with my nephew :)

What is your real value ?

Hello guys, you know here we are on TV. So follow the orders. We will first make a fake “call” so that we will say your name and you will all have to applause as if you were going to go to the real jury’s room. But it’s fake, don’t get moved. And play the game. We don’t want no question, the first one who starts to break balls will be dismissed. You know it is a show, there are some rules to respect so that the show can work.

And also. Be on time. We have a very strict schedule so please abide by the rules and the agenda. Don’t go to pee without permission. You can go to smoke but if you are outside while we call you, you will be automatically disqualified. Today is a big work day. So have this in your mind.

OK so let’s summarize the day : 2 interviews with the TV crew – in the end no questions about private life. Am glad. Many questions about why you are better than the other ones. Well as a good Libra guy, (“since you don’t want to take somebody else’s place you will never get rich”, thos astrology site says ...) I answered that I did not know if I would win. God only knows – if you believe in God. But who knows ? (if you don’t believe …). So well 2 interviews. Funny. I saw that being in front of the camera is not such a big deal. Funny and enjoyable. The training I had one year ago at work “Excellence in presentation skills ” has been useful. Interesting practice to introduce yourself in front of a camera. New for me.

Coming back to this post's title, the question about value … 90% of the guys today are 18 years old at most. They are so stressed. Rehearsing, repeating every word, sweating, stepping all around. The most peaceful ones (or more stressed ?) will kill the pain playing a song on the guitar. And I, thinking about when I play in the metro. Talking about it. Going with the kid’s parents to ask them what they think. Are they proud? Are they stressed? What do they feel? And what do their babies feel? I have no stress. And young guys come to me to ask me how I do not to be stressed while the TV guy told me I was going to pass in 5 minutes …

Value.

Why are you so quite?

I am not scared, it is a show. I don’t worry about winning or not.

But, the girl would say, neither am I here to win. I am here to know my value. I want to work in music and I don’t know if I am good or bad. I know my friends and family always tell me that I am very good but I don’t know if I am. I want to know about my value.

Good question, kiddie. What is your value ? And do you really think your value will be defined here? Girlie, here only you will be told about your commercial value. How easily you can be sold. Not about the emotional value neither about your musical skills. If you win, cool for you. If you don’t, it will just mean that you are not so easily merchandisable. That’s it. Don’t worry.

Look, I have to go now, it’s my turn …

Waiting for the bullet

Today second day. Waking up proudly at 6.15. Proud first of course because I am one of the 40 best singers my hometown. Or better said – I am one of the 40 people that have been considered as the most sellable in the Nouvelle Star process. Very different. Anyway, am very proud of it. Proud also because I can count with the fingers of a three-fingered hand the times I have waken up this early on a Sunday. And of course proud to put on for the 4th consecutive day, my Rolling Stones t-shirt. Sweaty and sticky but it has dried overnight :)

So ok, belly’s full, teeth are clean , body’s covered for that pre-winter’s morning. I am sure to kick ass today. I am sure i twill be a good day. I am just a bit frustrated to spend the whole day in the casting process, cos’ today’s my nephew’s birthday party. 15 years. An age full of complexes for me. Was such a nerds ; I was the ugly virgin duck. Coin coin. To illustrate the difference of self-esteem this little guy has with his uncle … my sister just told me the last conversation they had could be summarized this way

Hey Mum, could you buy me a box of condoms ?

Gonna getcha, you little son of a ….

Son of a sister of mine :) Well. Sexuality. Adolescence, complexes, nephew, birthday, whole day. Casting. I am ready.

Today appointment at 8 AM they said. Don’t need to queue for the 7 hours like yesterday. Which is pretty cool because yesterday I just could feel my stomach pushing on my lungs and my kidney and everything that could serve to make place to all the … stress that were filling my stomach. So well today the only thing is to arrive at 8 AM.

7.30. My sister should already be here; she said she would pick me up that time. 7.35.36.37. …. Come on sister I am stressed when I have an appointment and we have to cross the city in 23 minutes … 22 …. One car arrives … it’s not you … please come come …. 21 …. 20 … oh that car is going very fast. Cannot be you, sister. Cannot. The car runs just too fast and you couldn’t brake that strong to stop in front of me. Oh man you could. You surely took 3 G's in your back when stopping that bullet-car. Ok let’s go inside mum, no time to loose. Shoot that bullet again, sis’ ! Let’s head to the Hilton hotel, I am impatient to kick ass!

Now back at the hotel. Right time, today’s the big day. Here is the little guy I met yesterday, he is with his family who came to cheer him up. My two timeless fans are here too. But it feels different. This little guy is 18 years old. I have just turned 28. I work. I am not gambling my life here. I play in the metro. I don’t need more audience. I am ok. No stress.

Ready to enter. Today, the little queue. Indeed, today’s the second step for me but still the first step for 1000 people who has just arrived and who is already queuing. So let’s enter now. Convocation, driving licence, please get in. And we, 40 people, step in the waiting room. With the parents, with the friends. With guitars for some of us; with mother’s sandwiches for the other ones. And with a good experience to live for almost all of us.

Now we are all here and the TV team comes in …

The interview part II: with the journalists

After the questionnaire, the preparation interview with the journalists. Mainly the same questions that in the paper, but some interesting questions.

Example: What would you do to win the game?

Nothing, really, I will just sing tomorrow.

Will you be intimidated tomorrow?

Honestly?

Yes of course.

Well honestly, today I was not really stressed. I don’t really want to win the game. Just to live that experience. Maybe to overcome some prejudices I have on the world of famous people and television. But I am not really interested in winning the game. This is all part of a business ; the word casting is you need somebody to fit in the "cast hole". With no clear requirements. So why to be intimidated? I have my life, I am happy of it. I like to play in the metro when I can ; I love to have my audience, my Parisian metro worried audience, who is in need of happiness, feelings and love. This means something to me. I was actually more worried for the Parisian metro audition than for today’s one, you know …

They seemed quite unsatisfied with my answer. They kept asking.

Ok but … you say you are sensitive … why are you sensitive?

Well I feel it is the same question as asking me why I am white …

No no, you seem to control everything; that you don’t let yourself go, and then you say you are sensitive and emotional; we don’t understand why.

Well, it is the sum of all I lived, from my education with my mum and ...

Oh, what do your parents do for a living?

My mum take care of kids and my dad I don't know.

Oh you had problems with your dad ? You seem you are troubled when you talk about him.

I don’t want to talk about my private life. We can talk about music, about my experience of metro busker, why not ?

Mmmm last year’s winner already played in the metro, so this will not sell ; forget it. Tell us about your dad …

Oh come on …

Ok if you don’t want to answer, but tomorrow in front of the cameras, it is possible that I ask you questions about your dad.

No big deal about that, but maybe I willl not answer your questions ….

But you know, the audience has to like you.

And you think they cannot like me for the love I give when I sing?

Well it is easier if we know you well ...

I know, you want to do a portrait for the biographies during the program right ?

Yes, of course !

Oh, you know what ? This is the part of the program where I go to cook or to the toilets … you know when I watch your show, I just listen to the guys singing and I really don’t care about what there life is. This is not music. So let’s talk about music, about love ….

After 30 minutes I figured out I had a very interesting discussion … with myself. No real interaction with the journalists who wanted a stereotype. A requirement. A young guy fulfilling their half-secret (and half-obvious) requirements.

Be tomorrow at 8 am, same place. With exactly the same cloth, so that we can have consistency in the interviews.

Man but I' already sweaty and sticky ....

No matters. See you tomorrow.

Now they release me, time to announce the good news to my first-day fans: mum and sister. And to tell them the absurd this world is :)

The interview part I: with the paper

The interview. I think the funniest and more interesting part of today’s adventure. First, the questionnaire. After the success, now the fun. Sit there, young guy. With the oher guys that were elected to be soon famous. Or not; the jury will decide tomorrow, but don’t worry. If you are already here, it means that you are good enough to carry on. They would say no, only if you are really bad.

If I am bad ... I don't think that the jury will really know whether I am good or bad but anyway. Alright. But is it the same for a 18-year old girl to hear that ? What if she fails tomorrow ?

Anyway young guy, here are the few pages you have to fill so that we can interview you. First now, offline; then tomorrow, with the cameras. See you in 30 minutes.

Well, let’s have a look at the questions. Name. Given name. And all that stuff: where do you live, where do you sleep tonight. Who with. How did you come here. Who with. How did you start to sing. Who with. What did make you decide to be “a singer”. And all this kind of questions that surely are very suitable for the target of the TV program, but that can appear very light when you are almost 30 years old. Anyway, let’s play the game. But with a little bit of humour.

Where do you sing more often?

In Parisian subway; Bastille station.

Have you already passed an audition?

Yes; to play in Parisian subway; Bastille station mainly.

What is the most exciting thing you have done lately?

Lately, to play in Parisian subway; Bastille station.

Which member of the jury do you fear most ?

I don’ watch TV that often. What are there names? I thought that Sinclair would be here and I would not really FEAR him but would get intimidated. However, people told me that he was not part of the program anymore so I really think that no one of the jury’s member will scare me.

(I hope they won’t get offended, but really what I fear the most is my potential reaction in front of people that I have already seen on TV. I, above all, hope that I will not forget the lyrics. Sometimes it happens to me in the metro and the thing is that there is no problem there …. But tomorrow it will have a big consequence! So that is what I fear but there is no room enough on this sheet to explain my thoughts on the subject.)

What have you done to prepare the casting?

Nothing.

What are you ready to do; to win the game and to impress the jury?

Well … nothing, I will just sing as well as I can.

What are your main qualities?

Sensitive; empathic.

Let's skip the rest of the the questions. Anyway I don't remember them all :)

If you are really curious to know what the exact questions, I recommend you to go and test this kind of castings. It's a nice stress and a lot of fun.

Chocolate does work

Oh I have a big doubt. Will they let me in with the driving license? Oh come on, here in France you can consider it as a proof of your identity … sometimes. Sometimes not. I just hope that here it will be the first option because it would be too stupid to stop here after 5 hours fifteen of waiting.

Ok here is my paper, my participant number and my driving license …. Yes ! I am in , now will start the big show … the big … sh … maaaaaaan ! A stairway. With hundreds of people sitting. Wanting to pee. To pooh. Pee pooh pooh pee do ! No way. Only this stairway but sure they will let us in soon.

1 hour and 15 minutes more …

Then everything is very quick. Stress arrives. I can finally release a part of it, flush and wash my hands. Take a deep breath and spread cold water on my face.

18 chairs. This is what I have to wait to enter one of the 4 casting rooms. Goes very quick. In a couple of minutes I am waiting at the door. The hostess has some candies and chocolates. She tells me the 2 judges are nice girls who love candies. Don’t say it twice. Let me grab 2 chocolates and try to corrupt them with that.

Door opens. I throw my bad joke “Hi ladies, may I try to corrupt you with those chocolates?” They almost laugh. Reading the form I give them (this kind of very clever forms where you get asked very clever questions like what is your name and hobbies, how many brothers and sisters …. So obvious you try to put very clever answers J). The lady on the left says oh you try to be the clever guy, well just tell us what songs you will sing us.

La Vie en Rose.

Don’t Worry Be Happy.

There you go young man!

Two songs. I saw them staring and liking that. Or just observing and being indifferent. I don’t know the facial expressions of professional casters. Well apparently they just loved it. Cool. Voice, emotions, I love it she says. Is it really your first casting? You seem you don’t care about the result, this is what makes you give. See you tomorrow. Just do exactly the same, guy, don’ try to be someone else.

Thanks for the advise, anyway I would not try to be someone else. I just can’t. Thank you for letting me move you. Thanks a lot. Open the door. Let the following guy in. People seeing the BRAVO paper in my hands and applauding. Cool feeling. Am in the 40 ones. Am very glad. Let’s move on. Now with the journalists ….

Sitting on the dock of the Nouvelle Star’s casting

Ok. In the mail they said to sleep well and to rehearse well two songs. Ok, true, I slept yesterday at 3.30 am. But is it my fault if there is such a time shift in California and that I did not have spoken to this friend for so long? Ok, ok ...

Anyway, wake up wake up! 9am. Let’s rehearse a bit. First, let’s choose what we are going to sing. La Vie en Rose should be great. And let’s try Radiohead’s Creep. Illustrates a lot my state of mind. I should be able to perform it well if I can manage to learn the lyrics. Let’s go, let’s do a bunch of push ups and hear that song in a loop.

I’m a creeeeeeeeeeep …; fsh fsh ….. I’m a weeeeeeirdo …; push …. Fsh fsh … what the hell am I …. Fsh fsh …. Jeeeeeeee …. Ppuuuuuushhhhhh ! 2 push ups are enough I guess. Let’s change of mode and just hear that song in a loop. 30 minutes.

Rehearse now. In the bedroom and in the shower. Then some cereals and we can leave. The appointment is at 2 pm so I think that arriving at 10 it should be ok.

Oh. But how can I arrive at 10 if it is already 11 am? Another situation where I would like to call Doc Brown but he’s never here when we need him J So let’s go.

11.45. Arrival at the meeting point. Hilton Hotel. Nice queue. Nice and big. Maaaaaan way larger that the one for the Eiffel Tower on a Sunday afternoon! Anyway let’s queue.

Oh funny, that guy there seems to want to attract the cameras. It seems that just stepping and making a little bit of noise, the camera is attracted as a magnet. Funny.

5 pm. Yes 5 pm and finally we are at the entrance. After 5 hours fifteen of talking and laughing with my mum. And laughing with my sister.

And laughing with my mum again when, wanting a nice picture with the casting’s poster,

I just threw it down to the floor … at least I thought my mum would have taken great pictures but this is the only one she could shoot.

Still some progress to make in the photo field; but my nice mum went to grab a coffee for me 3 hours ago. I want to sleep, caffeine has gone …. Through I don’t know where, cos’ in 5 hours and fifteen I have not gone to the bathroom . And the worst is to come …

I am impatient to discover.

Ready to enter …